


As the Sun Sets On Friendship

by Tharxmolemow



Series: The Sea Salt Life [1]
Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: But Only Referenced For One Subordinate Clause, Domestic Sea Salt Fam, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Past Abuse, post kh3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 09:15:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20273542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tharxmolemow/pseuds/Tharxmolemow
Summary: Roxas drags Vanitas out to celebrate their one year anniversary as friends—but Vanitas isn't sure if "friends" is all he wants to be anymore.





	As the Sun Sets On Friendship

**Author's Note:**

> Would you look at that, I finished a fic. I was just that desperate for fluffy vanroku. Let them have fun and be kids, Nomura ;-;

  
_  
_ _"You don't understand, I—" _

_ "You what? Wanted to be whole again? Wanted to take back everything that was ripped away from you? Wanted to live a normal life instead of spending every second of every day suffocating under the weight of your own pain?" _

How does he know that? 

_ "Because if that is truly what makes you evil...then I have no right to call myself a guardian of light." _

I see now. He's like me. But how is it that when I look at him, all I see is light? He's so warm and bright. What's the difference between us? Why can't I be like that? 

_ "It's different!" Vanitas shouts, bringing his keyblade down again. Once again, his attack is blocked. "I'm not like you! I'm nothing but darkness. I can't be saved." _

_ "How do you know when no one has even tried? Stop fighting me, Vanitas!" _

_ But Vanitas doesn’t stop fighting. Every one of his blows is met with a block, but never a counterattack. He’s getting frustrated—what the hell is wrong with this guy? _

_ “Fight back already!” _ _  
_ _ “I can’t—no, I _ won’t— _ hurt you.” _

_ That statement has Vanitas halting his attack. “What?” _

_ “I know how much pain you’re in. I refuse to add to it.” Vanitas feels his keyblade slipping from his fingers. “There’s no reason for you to keep fighting. It’s _ okay, _ Vanitas.” _

_ Vanitas. _

_ Vanitas. _

_ Vanitas? _

** _ Vanitas!_ **

Vanitas opens his eyes to see an irritated face frowning down at him. 

“Ugh. What do you want, Roxas?” he groans, hitting the other boy in the face with his pillow. 

“I’ve been trying to wake you up for three minutes now. I guess you and Ven _ do _have some things in common.” Roxas is smirking now. Still invading Vani’s personal space. Still not letting him sleep. “What were you dreaming about anyways? You wouldn’t stop thrashing.”

Vani isn’t about to tell him that he’d been dreaming about when they met, so he rolls on his side and pretends to go back to sleep.

“Oh no, you’re not allowed to sleep anymore. Today’s an important celebration. Get up!”

Vanitas all but hisses when the covers are yanked away from him and a pair of hands shakes him violently. 

“Okay, okay! I’m awake!” He shoves Roxas away and sits up straight. “Just what the hell are we all celebrating this time?”

Roxas always did this. He kept meticulous track of dates, and insisted on celebrating anything he deemed “important.” His first day of school, his first trip to the Twilight Town beach, the first time he beat Riku in a race: all things he considered anniversaries worth commemorating. Xion’s excitement always matched his, and Lea and Isa were too soft to tell them to stop, so Vani always got dragged along with them. To this day he still pretends he hates it. 

“Nothing minor this time, I promise,” Roxas assures him. “And I actually meant for you and I to celebrate it, ya know, just the two of us? If that’s okay.”

Vanitas narrows his eyes, noticing the light pink dusting the other boy’s cheeks. 

“I might say yes if you tell me what it is,” he tells him. 

“So you really don’t remember?” The look on Roxas’s face is the epitome of ‘disappointed but not surprised’. “It’s the anniversary of the day we became friends.”

Vani’s eyes widen. Was it really? _ Is that why I was dreaming about it? _

“Friends? You realize I was trying to kill you.”

Roxas hums. “But we were still friends by the end of the day, weren’t we?”

Vanitas sighs. “I guess.”

“Besides, if you were really trying to kill me, you sucked at it.” 

“Shut up.” 

Sometimes Vanitas wonders what would have happened to him if Ventus had found him before Roxas had. He never heard the full story behind how it happened, only that Ventus had expressed concern about him returning, and the others all began discussing how to destroy him for good. That idea didn’t sit well with Roxas—something about how you can’t just _ destroy _ your other—so he went against the rest of the group and searched for Vani himself. 

When Roxas did end up bringing Vanitas back, a huge argument had broken out. The adults and Ventus all thought he should be locked up on the spot. Roxas insisted Vani should come home with him. It didn’t take much for Xion to take his side, and then Lea. Once Isa agreed to keep an eye on him, the argument was won, and the self-named (by Lea) Sea Salt Family took him in. 

Vanitas had been met with an inordinate amount of patience and understanding upon moving in with them. He turned out to be right at home with a group of ex-organization members with checkered pasts of their own, and he grew attached to each of them fairly quickly.

Xion helps him with his clothes and takes him to the beach to look for seashells. Isa teaches him everything from practical, everyday skills, to how to verbally destroy a man's soul. Lea buys him ice cream and lets him set things on fire. Roxas, though. Roxas will always be his favorite. 

Roxas makes him feel safe, relaxed, _ happy_. Every time Vanitas thinks about him, a warm, tingly feeling fills his chest, and talking to the blond always makes his heart race. He isn't sure exactly what these feelings are or what they mean, but he knows he likes them. They feel good. Being with Roxas feels good.

Well, usually. Right now it’s bothersome having the blond stare at him impatiently while he tries to get dressed. 

“I know I’m hot, but could you stop looking at me?” When in doubt, mask your embarrassment with snark. 

This time Roxas is the one hurling pillows as he quickly jumps to defend himself. “Don’t flatter yourself! I’m just making sure you don’t fall back asleep.”

“Don’t make me kick you out of my room.”

  
“Fine, I’ll leave. That won’t stop me.”

Roxas gets up and walks across the blue line of tape in the center of the room, then plops down on the bed on the other side. He’s still stubbornly glaring at Vanitas, and the older boy sighs. 

“One of these days, I am putting up a curtain between your half of the room and mine.” 

“Oh no, anything but a piece of cloth!” Roxas says dramatically. Vanitas rolls his eyes. 

As soon as he’s dressed, Vanitas bolts out of their room and to the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind him. From there it only takes five more minutes to get ready, but he nearly jumps out of his skin when he opens the door to find Roxas standing right on the other side. 

“What is _ wrong _with you today?” Vanitas asks in exasperation. 

“Sor_ry _ I wanted to spend time with you before the day ended. Next time there’s an important day I’ll just let you sleep through the whole thing.” Roxas is frowning, his arms crossed, but he’s failing miserably at acting angry. 

That strange tingly feeling comes back at the thought that Roxas wants to be around him, and Vanitas is helpless to stop the smile that takes over his face. “I’ll be quicker next time.”

“That’s all I ask.” Roxas face softens at that, and he grabs a hold of Vani’s wrist to lead him out of the house and onto the streets of Twilight Town. 

Vanitas has no clue why his face has felt so hot since Roxas’s hand wrapped around his wrist. This isn’t the first time they’ve had physical contact with each other: they push each other around all the time! This, though...it feels different somehow. And the difference is making his stomach do back flips. 

“You okay? We’ve made it halfway to the station and you haven’t insulted me once,” Roxas pipes up after a while. 

How did they make it that far already? Why is he so fixated on this? 

“Just wondering where you’re taking me,” Vanitas tells him. 

“Oh.” Roxas stops walking. _ He’s still not letting go. _“I thought we could go to the beach? I know it’s not exactly special, but unless you want to hit each other with foam bats for a while, there’s not much else to do around here. We could go to another world, but…”

They both tense at the thought. With the exception of the occasional trip to Destiny Islands, they don’t like to go to other worlds. The constant barrage of memories that aren’t theirs aside, they just feel out of place in all those worlds. They never made friends, or interacted in those worlds the way Ven and Sora did. They were lurkers, outsiders, fulfilling their tasks out of sight and then leaving. They tried going back a handful of times, but the sense that they didn’t belong never left them, and it never let them enjoy the trip. 

“Nah, the beach is fine. I usually go with Xion anyways, and it’s different with you,” Vani says. 

“What do you mean different?” Vani’s heart stutters. Roxas has no right to make that pouty face at him while still not letting go of him. The hint of sadness in his voice doesn’t help either. 

“Well for starters, she’s never tried to drown me in the ocean.” That comment earns him a punch in the arm from Roxas’s free hand. 

“That’s because you’ve never lifted her up and _ thrown her in it_,” Roxas retorts. 

“You said you were hot!” Vani defends himself. 

They both break out into laughter, and Roxas continues leading the way to the station. If it meant listening to that laugh forever, Vanitas would follow him anywhere. Wait...where did that thought come from? _ I need to get a grip. _

It’s when he’s paying for their train tickets that Roxas finally lets Vanitas go. Vani’s wrist feels cold now. He half expects the warm hand to come back once they have their tickets, but instead Roxas says a quick “let’s go” before walking to the train. Vani tries not to be disappointed. 

There’s hardly anyone else on the train, so there’s plenty of space for them to sprawl out. That’s why Vanitas is surprised when Roxas chooses to sit right up against him. The blond is being a lot touchier than usual today, and while Vani isn’t complaining, he is curious as to why. _ I better not ask, _he thinks. If he says anything about it, Roxas might sit farther away. He really doesn’t want him to do that. 

The ride to the beach is a peaceful one. Both boys get to reminiscing about some of their favorite memories from the past year. The beginning had been rough on both of them. Among other issues, Vanitas was having a difficult time learning to let his guard down and put his trust in other people, always flinching at sudden moves and isolating himself; meanwhile Roxas was still struggling to let go of his anger and go back to who he was before his life had gone downhill. As they got over the initial awkward phase, however, they had a lot of fun together. 

“I will never forget the time you filled Isa’s closet with Floods. I swear, I had never seen that man startled before that moment!”

“I don’t think either of us can ever compete with the time Xion cast Stopga on him and Lea and did their hair to look like each other’s. They were _ so _mad.”

“I’m amazed they haven’t thrown us out yet.”

“Only because you’re their perfect little sunshine child, and you’d be sad if they took us away.”

“Hey!” Roxas shoves Vanitas’s shoulder. 

“What? It’s true. You’re definitely their favorite, you little suck up.”

“Gross, you make it sound like they’re our parents or something. And I am _ not _a suck up!”

The train reaches its stop, and Vanitas is the first to get out of his seat. “Suckupsayswhat,” he calls over his shoulder before sprinting out of the train. 

“What? Oh, real mature!” Roxas shouts and chases after him. 

As soon as they’re running over the sand and not the pavement, Roxas lunges forward and tackles Vanitas to the ground. The latter tries to get away, but soon finds himself with his back in the sand and a very smug blond sitting on top of him. 

“You are freakishly strong, you know that?” Vani groans. 

“So I’ve been told.” Roxas chuckles. “You didn’t really think you were getting away, did you?”

“Nope.” Vanitas grins. “What’s the plan now, genius? Gonna sit on me all day? I know you won’t hit me.”

Roxas frowns. “No, but I will do this.”

Vanitas sputters as a handful of sand is shoved in his face, and he feels rather than sees Roxas roll off of him before running away. “It is so on now!” Vani yells after him, springing to his feet. 

Eventually he catches up and gets his revenge, but Roxas is quick to retaliate. Things quickly devolve into a sand-ball fight when they find themselves on the wet sand near the waves, and their clothes end up completely ruined. 

When they finally let up, it’s not because they’re tired. It’s because they’re both laughing too hard to keep up. 

“I’m willing to call this a draw if you are,” Vanitas offers through bursts of laughter. 

“Okay. Truce?” Roxas extends his hand. 

“Truce.” Vani takes it with a smile, and they both relax. For all the little ways they love to mess with each other, neither of them has ever violated a truce. 

Vani plops himself down on the ground, his stomach still hurting from laughing. He lies back and catches his breath, watching fondly as Roxas does the same. Roxas has sand caked all over his face, the grains even clinging to his eyelashes, and it’s all Vanitas can do to stop himself from reaching over and swiping it off. There’s nothing inherently weird about wanting to help a friend, but for some reason the thought of touching Roxas’s face makes Vani’s own face heat up. 

The sand _ is _getting rather annoying though, so once they’ve both finished catching their breath, Vanitas suggests they swim. There’s sand in the water, and sand that will cling to them when they walk back, but surely it can’t be as bad as the thick globs of sand all over the both of them right now. 

“For someone who loves the beach, you really hate sand don’t you?” Roxas comments. 

“I’ve had more than enough of it for a lifetime, now are you gonna swim with me or not?” 

“If that’s what you want.” 

For once, when they swim, they don’t race or splash at one another. Instead they float around peacefully, enjoying both the sound and the feeling of the waves. They’re still worn out from all the chasing and throwing, and it isn’t long before they’re too tired to keep themselves afloat. They make their way back to land, opting to lie down on one of the rocks along the shore.

They’re too out of breath to speak for a while, but that’s fine by Vanitas. The silence feels comfortable. Something about Roxas always makes everything feel right. Even on nights when his thoughts are too loud and his past tries its damnedest to haunt him, just looking across the room and knowing that Roxas is there is enough to put his heart at ease. 

Vanitas doesn’t even realize he’s reached out his hand until Roxas takes hold of it and gives it a gentle squeeze. 

“Hey, you’re having fun today, right?” the blond asks. 

What a ridiculous question; this day is already one of Vani’s favorites he’s ever had. “Obviously, idiot.” 

Roxas laughs in response. “That’s good. Not sick of coming here yet?”

“Not at all.”

“Sick of me yet?” 

Vanitas knows he means it as a joke, yet the notion brings a sharp sting in chest. “I could never get sick of the best thing in my life.”

It isn’t until the words have already left his mouth that Vanitas fully processes what he's said, but he finds himself agreeing with them nonetheless. Maybe the anniversary is to blame for his sappiness, but Roxas _ is _the best thing in his life, and he deserves to hear it. 

Roxas’s face is the pinkest it’s been all day, and his lips keep twitching in a futile resistance against a smile. The sight has the tingling in Vanitas’s chest spreading to his stomach, and for a moment his heart hurts. But why should it hurt? Vanitas knows for a fact that he’s happy, yet there’s something else mixed in—some feeling he could only describe as overwhelming.

“You wanna go to the clocktower?” Roxas speaks up after a minute. He looks like he wants to say more, but he doesn’t. 

“Sure,” Vani agrees, sitting up. 

He’s briefly worried Roxas will pull his hand away again as they stand up, but he doesn’t; not even once they’ve turned to walk back to the station. 

“Hey, can I ask you something?” Vanitas asks as they walk. 

“Of course.” Roxas nods. 

“Have you ever been so happy that it...hurt?” The question seems to shock Roxas, and Vanitas begins to fear that this is just another thing that’s wrong with him. 

“All the time, actually,” Roxas responds hesitantly. “Mostly when I’m with you.”

“Oh.” He wasn’t expecting that. 

“Why uh...why do you ask?”

“No reason.” Vanitas knows that Roxas is smart enough to figure that out on his own, so why embarrass himself saying it out loud? 

“You’re the best thing in my life too, by the way,” Roxas states unexpectedly. Whatever he says after that is completely lost to Vanitas. 

The overwhelming feeling seems multiplied by ten now, and all of Vani’s brain power is focused on resisting the urge to grab a hold of his friend and pull him as close as physically possible. He settles for clinging to his hand like a lifeline, and this time even when they’re on the train, he doesn’t let go. 

_ The best thing in his life? _ Vanitas can hardly believe it. He wouldn’t consider himself a good thing in most people’s lives, much less the best. It may be obvious why Roxas is important to him, but what the hell should someone like him matter to Roxas? _ Maybe you’d know if you’d listened while he was talking, _his brain scolds him. Damn he hates when it’s right. 

At least Roxas doesn’t seem to have noticed that Vanitas didn’t listen. He’s too busy staring at the ground and trying to cover his blush with his free hand. _ He’s so cute… _

Vanitas shakes his head to clear it of the thought. More and more lately he was finding every little thing Roxas does to be cute. It doesn’t make sense. As far as Vani knows, that’s the kind of thing people thought about when they were in a relationship.

_ That’s not what I want though, right? _ Vanitas isn’t completely naive to the concept. He knows what dating is, and he knows that romantic and platonic love are two different things. This is the first time, however, that he’s ever considered that _ that’s _ why his feelings towards Roxas are so different from his other friends. _ That can’t be it. I don’t want Roxas to be my boyfriend, do I? _

As soon as the thought crosses his mind, he finds himself picturing introducing Roxas to people as his boyfriend. The ache in his chest comes back with a vengeance at the image, and Vanitas swallows thickly. Crap. That’s exactly what he wants. The mere idea of getting to call the boy beside him _ his _has his heart beating so fast he thinks he’s going to pass out. 

“Are you feeling alright? You feel like you’re burning up.” Roxas’s voice breaks through his thoughts.

Vani’s eyes dart to where his far-too-clammy hand is holding onto Roxas’s, and he tugs it away self consciously. 

“It’s nothing,” he deflects. 

“Okay...oh, we’re here.” Roxas stands up when the train stops, and Vanitas pretends not to notice the way the blond holds his discarded hand to his chest and frowns deeply. 

_ Great, now look what you did. _Vanitas has half a mind to slap himself.

“Sorry my hand was so sweaty,” he says in an attempt to rectify the situation. “Probably felt gross.”

“Ah, I didn’t mind it,” Roxas responds, smiling softly. The gloom around him dissipates, and he slips back into a cheerful mood. Vanitas sighs in relief. 

They slip into an easy chatter, and in no time they’re up on the clock tower, sea salt ice cream in hand. Vanitas stares at the bar in his hand, remembering the first time he’d tried one of these. He’d been shocked that it was salty, then commented on how it was also sweet. He was confused when Roxas started laughing at him, only to have the blond explain that “you, Xion, and I all share the same brain, I swear.” 

“Happy anniversary, Roxas,” Vani says once they’re settled. 

“Happy anniversary, Vani,” Roxas replies. They tap their ice creams together as a sort of toast before starting to eat. “I’m sorry I couldn’t think of anything to make it more special.”

“At least you remembered it,” Vanitas points out. “Besides, I told you I had fun, didn’t I?”

“You sure you weren’t just saying that to make me feel better?” Roxas asks with a nervous chuckle. 

“Come on, Rox. We both know I’m not that nice.” Vanitas grins.

“You got me there.”

They break into laughter, and Vanitas seizes the opportunity to admire the adorable way Roxas’s eyes scrunch up. Once they calm down and finish their ice cream, though, Roxas has an oddly serious expression on his face.

“Uh oh, am I in trouble?” Vani questions.

“No.” Roxas shakes his head. “It’s just...there’s something kind of important I wanted to tell you. That’s why I wanted today to be just you and me.”

Immediately some stupid part of Vani’s brain starts wondering if Roxas is about to confess to him, and he hates it for that. His best friend is trying to tell him something serious, and his brain has the nerve to make it about him. What kind of horrible friend is he? 

“Are you even listening?” Roxas raises a brow at him. 

“Huh?” _ I’m an idiot. _

“Vanitas!” Roxas whines. “I don’t wanna tell you anymore.” 

“Wait! No, please continue. I’ll listen, I swear.” _ Please I would do anything for you please please talk to me. _Vanitas’s stomach is in knots, and he can hardly believe how hopelessly, pathetically head-over-heels he’s fallen for the irritable blond beside him. 

Roxas narrows his eyes at him for a moment before sighing and continuing to speak. “I was _ saying, _even though I’ve only known you for a year, it really feels like I’ve known you my whole life. Well, I guess that is a solid third of my life, but that’s beside the point. I’m trying to say that you mean a lot to me, and my life wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Vanitas wants to say he feels the same, but Roxas holds up a hand to stop him. 

“I’m not done. A while ago I realized that I started to feel strange around you. My heart would always race, sometimes even hurt. I kept having all these weird, stupid thoughts. On top of that, there was this one weird other feeling mixed in that I’d never felt before, and I had no clue what it was so I…” Roxas trails off, a deep blush settling on his cheeks. “I asked Lea about it. And now I understand what all those feelings were about.” 

_ No way. There’s no way this is actually happening. _

“Vani, I—”

“Be my boyfriend,” Vanitas interrupts him.

“What?” Roxas gapes at him. 

“You should be my boyfriend,” Vani repeats. 

“No, shut up. I was supposed to ask first!” Vanitas laughs as Roxas chucks his ice cream stick at him indignantly, a flustered look on his adorable red face. 

“Then ask me.” 

“Vanitas, will you be my boyfriend?” Roxas asks, a mock-angry tone in his voice. 

“No.” 

“Vanitas!”

Okay, maybe Vani was being too mean this time. 

“Yes, Roxas. Very much yes.” 

Somehow the confession only made the overwhelming feeling _ worse, _ and Vanitas feels like he’s suffocating with the need to be closer to his best friend. To his _ boyfriend. _He feels like he’ll die if they’re even an inch apart, the need to hold onto the other boy making him ache. 

Luckily, Roxas seems to be a mind-reader, and he nearly knocks Vani off the clocktower when he dives in to hug him. As soon as he regains his balance, Vanitas puts all his energy into hugging back with everything he has. It's better, but it’s still not enough.

“Roxas,” he calls out, his voice muffled by the other boy’s hair. “Let me kiss you.”

He’s surprised when, instead of answering with words, Roxas leans back and yanks him into a kiss. It’s a little rough for a first kiss, and a little awkward on account of neither of them having prior experience. Still, it finally, _ finally _makes the crushing desperation lessen; so Vanitas plants his hands on Roxas's shoulders and kisses him again and again until his heart calms down at last. By that point Roxas is panting and clinging to Vani’s shirt like his life depends on it, and Vanitas could cry from how precious he looks. 

They each take a moment to catch their breath, turning back to face the sunset. 

“You know, it’s pretty cool how things worked out,” Roxas says. “Having our anniversary and our friendiversary on the same day.” 

Vanitas scoffs. “Yeah, like you didn’t plan it that way. You just didn’t wanna have to remember two dates.”

“At least _ I _remembered this one.” 

“So you _ were _upset about that. You just had to ruin the moment, didn’t you?”

“I did not ruin the moment!”

“Prove it.”

“How?”

“Kiss me you coward.”

Vanitas struggles not to laugh into the kiss as Roxas all but attacks him. He isn’t even upset about the overlapping dates, he just likes throwing Roxas off his game. He’s actually grateful that both of their anniversaries are on the same date. 

This way it’s easy for him to remember the two happiest days of his life. 

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to Damian for editing and helping me with the title, and to Mar for helping me with the confession scene. Couldn't have done this without y'all.


End file.
